Sunday, December 2, 2018

Movie Review: "Perfect" (1985)

Director: James Bridges
Year: 1985
Rating: R
Running Time: 1 hour, 55 minutes

A Rolling Stone reporter goes to Los Angeles to write an article about how fitness clubs are the singles bars of the '80s. While there, he falls for a local aerobic instructor who has an aversion to journalists.

Perfect 1985 movie gif thrusting exercise Jamie Lee Curtis
"I'm glad I met you and I'm sorry I met you." (Image Source)
We didn't actually get out a stopwatch to time it exactly, but if we had to guess, we'd say "Perfect" is about 35% comprised of shots of gratuitous pelvic thrusting. This film is directed by James Bridges, who has directed movies like "Urban Cowboy" and "The China Syndrome." He also helped write the screenplay along with Aaron Latham and is based on Latham's own magazine article "Looking for Mr. Goodbody - Health Clubs: The New Singles Bars." Adam (John Travolta) is a reporter working for Rolling Stone Magazine. He is working on a story about a businessman (Kenneth Welsh) locked in a court battle with the U.S. government. His story brings him to Los Angeles where he decides to work on a second piece about how health clubs are the burgeoning new singles bars of the '80s. Adam wants to focus the article on the club's head aerobics instructor, Jessie (Jamie Lee Curtis), but she refuses to cooperate and does not want to be interviewed. In his pursuit of the story, he begins to fall for Jessie, but his desire to write a compelling article starts to drive a wedge between the two of them.
Perfect 1985 movie gif thrusting exercise John Travolta
"It was love at first sight. I took one look at those tits and my whole body got hard." (Image Source)
"Perfect" is meant to be a serious dramatic romance that deals with themes of journalistic trust and integrity. In that aspect, it is an absolute failure. The film has a complete lack of focus. It follows two simultaneous storylines that practically have nothing to do with each other. There is the story about Adam and Jessie, and then there is Adam's coverage of a court case between a businessman and the government, and the two just don't mesh. The only reason the businessman story is even in the film in the first place is for a final act plot device where Adam can eventually show that he has honor and sincerity and will do the right thing even if it means sacrificing his career to do it. Both plot lines are quite dull overall, and they both drag on for far too long without an end in sight. In fact, the only thing about "Perfect" that works perfectly comes in the form of its unintentional comedy gold. The ridiculous '80s outfits, the big 80's hair, and its cheesy, off-color dialogue about scrounging up a gang-bang and being the most used piece of exercise equipment offer up a lot of holler-out-loud moments. It may not be what the director intended, but it is entertaining as hell to watch. There are also several uncomfortably long aerobic scenes where the exercises look like people are trying to have sex with the air around them as they thrust up and down and left and right while looking people dead in the eyes and attempt to make sexy faces while sweating profusely. Judging by this movie alone, apparently, the key to good health in the '80s was a strong, well-toned pelvis as it seems 90% of the workouts are pelvis-focused.
Perfect 1985 movie gif thrusting exercise John Travolta
"It's a lot more fun looking for Mr. Goodbody than Mr. Goodbar." (Image Source)
We must say, watching Jamie Lee Curtis and John Travolta thrusting their groins towards the screen over and over can be mesmerizing, but it just isn't enough to save "Perfect" from being an overlong bore when people aren't plunging and shoving their privates back and forth in (and out of) the gym. Despite all the negging we've been doing in this review, if you're the kind of person who appreciates a good-bad movie, we still think you should give this one a shot. Come on, look at those gifs!

My Rating: 3/10
BigJ's Rating: 3/10
IMDB's Rating: 4.3/10
RT Rating: 19%
Do we recommend this movie: AVOID LIKE THE PLAGUE!!! (but also, watch instantly)

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