Movie Review #317: "The Green Inferno" (2015)

Movie: "The Green Inferno"
Ticket Price: $7.00
Director: Eli Roth
Rating: R
Running Time: 1 hour, 40 minutes

Image Source

A group of college student activists travel to Peru to protest the deforestation of the Amazon and the displacement and murder of native tribes. While returning home from a successful demonstration, their plane goes down in the middle of the rainforest and they are captured by one of the native tribes they were trying to protect. This tribe turns out to be cannibalistic and they plan to eat the group of activists.  

Eli Roth is basically the king of torture porn gore-fest cinema. If you are familiar with Roth's previous works such as "Cabin Fever" and the "Hostel" series, you pretty much know what to expect and how he operates when it comes to his movies. When "The Green Inferno" was first made back in 2013, there was a lot of hype around how gory, gross, unsettling, and disturbing the film was. There were rumors that people couldn't stomach to sit through it and they were throwing up in the aisles; some even needed to be transported to hospitals because they were so sick afterwards. Now that the film has finally got national distribution from Blumhouse, we had the opportunity to see it (well, I went reluctantly), and though it is extremely gory and gross, it certainly didn't live up to the lofty expectations set before us.

Let's get it out of the way first: do not see this movie if you have a weak stomach for blood, guts, gore, violence, vomit, diarrhea, bodily fluids, the shafts of penises, ritualistic slaughter, or a fear of travel because this movie has all of this and more. If you aren't used to seeing films like this or aren't a horror fan, A) what the hell are you doing watching this film?, and B) regardless of how hardcore you think you are if you are a horror/gore fan, this movie could definitely rattle you and it might even make you queasy. Hell, I'm a huge horror movie fan and even I recoiled in horror a couple of times. For the avid horror fan, "The Green Inferno" is par for the disgusting course and is full of sick, twisted images and depraved behavior that might make you reach for the nearest barf bag. Sadly, it doesn't really break any new ground and probably isn't anything you haven't seen before. To us, it is actually far less effective than Roth's previously mentioned film "Hostel." One reason for this is the situation in "Hostel" is far more relateable. The chances of someone vacationing in Europe are probably much higher than getting stranded in the rainforest because of a plane crash after protesting in a foreign country. Another reason is because in "Hostel," we as the audience truly despise those who are doing the torturing and killing because they are simply sadistic bastards, and here, the people involved in the cannibalism are just a tribe living by what is socially and morally acceptable to them. Here, the only character we hate from very early on is the head of the activist group Alejandro, played by Ariel Levy, who winds up being a total asshat and sociopath.

There is definitely some ultimate irony in the activists being eaten by the very tribe they were trying to save, yet their only hope of survival is being rescued by the very people they were trying to stop. This is the only plot point worth mentioning apart from the rest of the carnage-filled barf-o-rama. Though the audience obviously gets this concept, the irony of their situation never seems to fully dawn on any of the characters themselves. Plus, the whole thing takes way too long to get going as it's well over the halfway point of the film before their plane actually crashes. Everything leading up to that point, though meant as character development, just felt like and is filler. Plus, none of the actors are particularly talented. Though they might just be inexperienced and only had a weak script and story to work with, they are still really bad nonetheless. Ultimately, it takes too long for us to care about any of them or their plight and very few people from their activist group other than the main protagonist Justine, played by Lorenza Izzo, were even likable, and even she was snotty. On a different note, the one good thing we can say is most of the gore is relatively realistic and done very well. The majority of the scenes were done with practical makeup work and were just bloody enough, though blood and gore for the sake of blood and gore with no good context around it doesn't constitute a horror movie. People are killed in a variety of different ways with a flimsy story holding it together, and one of the worst death scene in the movie involves some really poorly CGI'ed ants, which are just so jarringly fake it took us right out of the danger and right into a smelly movie theater of falseness, knocking the suspension of disbelief right out of us.

There are a lot of gray areas when it comes to the tribe used in this film as extras, and many people have gone as far as saying Roth is a racist for using them under false or misleading pretenses, raising them up as the stars only to cast them as carnal, cannibalistic savages. We don't know if we'd go as far as using the word "racist," but something definitely didn't sit right with us about the contradictions in this regard when all was said and done. There are some truly awful performances, tons of "jokes" that didn't land where they were intended, and not a whole lot redeeming about "The Green Inferno" apart from the aforementioned buckets o' blood and guts. It's not what we thought it would be and it's certainly not Roth's best.

My Rating: 4/10
BigJ's Rating: 5/10
IMDB's Rating: 6.6/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 37%
Do we recommend this movie: Meh.

Movie Review #316: "Learning to Drive" (2015)

Movie: "Learning to Drive"
Ticket Price: $7.00
Director: Isabel Coixet
Rating: R
Running Time: 1 hour, 30 minutes

Image Source

After literary critic Wendy's (Patricia Clarkson) husband leaves her for another woman, she is forced to make many changes to her life, one of which is finally learning how to drive with the help of driver instructor Darwan (Ben Kingsley). They two begin an unlikely friendship where they discuss their lives and relationships to each other.

If we had a dollar for every time the city of New York was alluded to as being a "character" in a film, we'd be rolling in moolah.

"Learning to Drive" stars one of our favorite actors, Ben Kingsley, so I was immediately interested in seeing this film. Really, he can do no wrong in our eyes and has continued to impress us, even in mediocre movies, time and time again. I also really like Patricia Clarkson as an actress, so watching them team up should have been a treat. While this movie is not bad, it's also not that great, either. It's got an interesting enough premise, but the execution is rather sloppy and we can't help but feel like we have seen this story told a billion times before in other better films. An unlikely duo of strangers pair up in some way, shape or form and begin a friendship, pushing past their cultural differences to teach one another how to do some thing, shape, or form. Here, after she gets blindsided by her husband wanting a divorce, Wendy, played by Clarkson, is ready to fall apart. The night of their breakup, she gets driven home in a cab by Darwan, played by Kingsley, and after leaving something in his car, she finds out he's a driving instructor. Driving is something she's always wanted to learn to do, but has never needed to do since she lives in New York City with all its subways, buses, and taxis. There are some slight romantic inklings between the two after a while, though Darwan is betrothed to a woman he has never met that was picked out for him by his sister in India in the style of an arranged marriage. As Wendy picks up the pieces of her shattered life and relationships mid-divorce, Darwan must learn to live with a woman he really knows nothing about, yet longs to continue teaching Wendy at the same time.

The majority of the problems in "Learning to Drive" have little to do with the acting, which boasts some excellent performances by both Clarkson, the fragile but angry book critic, and Kingsley, the good-natured, shy and devout cab driver who is simply trying to keep his cool in a city where he is mistaken for something he is not. The problems stem from its disjointedness. Though Wendy and Darwan are both explored as characters individually and separately, the other characters around them have little to no development whatsoever. For example, Wendy and her ex-husband have a daughter named Tasha, played by Grace Gummer, who is rarely in the film apart from two scenes to express her interest in dropping out of school in order to farm in Vermont??? What?? So hipster, so New York. It's as if Tasha is pointless other than being a minor catalyst to help Wendy get her driver's license and learn to drive (which she probably should have done anyways). In fact, most of the characters who are involved in Wendy's life other than Darwan are either underdeveloped or introduced only to disappear after a scene or two, and this includes her sister Debbie, played by Samantha Bee. In between these random character introductions are a series of Wendy's daydream fantasies as she talks to people in her life past and present, like her husband or her dad. These interludes are sort of a "trick" of the indie film genre. Since Wendy is a book critic, we are to assume she has an active imagination, but really, these random scenes feel more like someone retelling how their therapy session went. While these sidebar interludes do work on occasion, here, we found them to be distracting as they interfered with the flow of the film. Many of them just seemed out of place and unnecessary.

All in all, we cannot wholly recommend "Learning to Drive" to everyone because of its often ambiguous, random characters, its overly mature and New York specific themes, and its metaphors galore for taking risks and starting over. Though it does have some good performances by some really terrific actors, it's simply not enough. To say there is no conflict or drama in this film is a misnomer because there's a lot of it, it's just mixed with honking horns, weird side fantasies, and an upper-crusty feel. We wish there had been more to it than what we were given.

My Rating: 6/10
BigJ's Rating: 6/10
IMDB's Rating: 6.6/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 67%
Do we recommend this movie: Sure, why not?

Movie Review #315: "Hotel Transylvania 2" (2015)

Movie: "Hotel Transylvania 2"
Ticket Price: $12.50
Director: Genndy Tartakovsky
Rating: PG
Running Time: 1 hour, 29 minutes

Image Source

Mavis (Selena Gomez) and Johnny (Andy Samberg) have gotten married and have been living at the Hotel Transylvania ever since, which now allows humans to stay there. A short time later, Mavis gets pregnant and gives birth to a son named Dennis (Asher Blinkoff). They are raising him in the hotel, but as they start to close in on his 5th birthday, Dennis still appears to be totally human and hasn't shown any monster traits, especially his fangs. Dracula (Adam Sandler) is worried that Dennis may never show his monster traits and Mavis starts to think it would be a good idea to raise him among humans. Dracula and his friends send Dennis through a crash course in monster training in the hopes that his monster side will come out and Mavis and her family won't leave the hotel.

The general premise of sequel "Hotel Transylvania 2" is pretty much the same as the original. Dracula doesn't want Mavis, and in this case the rest of her new family, to leave the hotel. Though Drac's reasons have changed, as well as his methods of attempting to get them to stay, the intentions are relatively similar to those of the first film, which boasted a decent enough animated comedy. Here, Mavis, voiced by Selena Gomez, and Johnny, voiced by Andy Samberg, have gotten married and have had a child named Dennis, voiced by Asher Blinkoff, an adorable little boy who is about to turn 5 years old. Marvis has gotten it into her mind that a move away from the hotel might be good for their family in order for Dennis to socialize with humans, but Drac is convinced Dennis has a monster inside of him. If Dennis hasn't gotten in his vampire fangs before his 5th birthday, though, instead of having monster abilities like his mother, Dennis might be completely human like his father for the rest of his life. Drac and all the usual suspects like Frankenstein, voiced by Kevin James, Griffin the invisible man, voiced by David Spade, Murray the Mummy, voiced by Keegan-Michael Key and replacing Cee-Lo Green from the first film, and Wayne the Werewolf, voiced by Steve Buscemi, must take Dennis on a monster-in-training crash course to all their old stomping grounds while Mavis and Johnny visit Johnny's parents in California, scoping it out to see if they should move there. Of course, shenanigans ensue, and instead of teaching Dennis how to be a vampire, what they end up doing is finding out that their own abilities have really gotten away from them, unwilling to scare and hunt like they did in their prime and growing soft in their old ages. Upon Mavis and Johnny's return, Drac has screwed up one too many times, and once his father Vlad, voiced by the incomparable Mel Brooks, who hates humans, finds out Dennis is half-human, half-vampire, things are about to get crazy up in the Hotel Transylvania.

Keeping in line with the first film in the franchise, this movie is pretty good, but it's not perfect. BigJ's rating slipped a little from that of the first film, finding it a little less funny and too much of the same rehashed plot points from the original. I laughed much more than I anticipated, especially for a sequel from Adam Sandler and his friends. Again, just like the original, there are a lot of bodily humor and fart jokes, because children apparently have short attention spans and only understand crass butt noises. Apart from these jokes, there are a few lines definitely intended for the adults in the crowd, which is something we missed from the first film. Newcomer Asher Blinkoff has the cutest voice as Dennis, the stereotypical big smiled, wide-eyed child with an innocence about him. As Drac and his friends teach him to become a monster, Dennis still favors Cakey the monster the best, a muppet-like cake lover who is on the television, much to the real monsters' chagrin. It's moments like these that set it apart from being just another bad animated movie, and though it's not perfect, we still didn't hate it. It has enough wackiness to go around, and a few scenes we quite enjoyed. We really liked watching Mavis explore California like a literal kid in a candy store, getting rainbow colored teeth from a 24/7 mini mart slushee machine. To me, though, once Mavis and Johnny have Dennis, Mavis seemed to become a bitchy, overprotective control freak, always yelling at Johnny and everyone else for no reason. In a way, this mirrors how real parents (not all, but some) can get and act upon having their first child. This is exactly what the first movie did, just the with mom-ster stereotype in places of the others from the original.

Somehow, even with the same plot points and 'crude' jokes, I thought "Hotel Transylvania 2" managed to be silly and cute enough for kids, and this time, adults might actually be able to have a little bit of fun, too. It's almost enough to make you forget you're paying to watch an Adam Sandler romp, but just only.

My Rating: 6.5/10
BigJ's Rating: 6/10
IMDB's Rating: 7.3/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 52%
Do we recommend this movie: Sure, why not?

Movie Review: "Sasquatch" (2003)

Image Source

Movie: "Sasquatch"
Director: Jonas Quastel
Year: 2003
Rating: R
Running Time: 1 hour, 26 minutes

When a plane carrying top secret equipment and the daughter of a billionaire CEO of a bio-tech corporation crashes, he hires a team of experts to go into the wooded mountains to locate the missing equipment and his daughter, but they find a deadly creature instead. 

The best way to describe the directing ability of Jonas Quastel when it comes to his film "Sasquatch," aka "The Untold," is inept. From the constant use of unnecessary fade outs, sometimes within seconds of one another, to a weird slow-motion camera that causes trailing visuals, to one scene that inexplicably spins the camera around to what sounds like bad 1970's porno music, to the way the Sasquatch has some weird x-ray vision, every single solitary thing about this film is just bad. It has terrible pacing and feels outrageously long despite being less than 90 minutes total in length. To go along with all of the dreadful directing is some truly bad writing, also courtesy of Jonas Quastel with an assist from Chris Lanning, who both seriously need to reevaluate their thinking when it comes to being involved in the movie industry. At its core, the story could have had a glimmer of hope to it, but Quastel and Lanning veer off every path they put in front of themselves to make a truly puzzling, repugnant film, if we can call it a film at all.

Despite this being an action adventure horror thriller, there it little to no action, it's not the least bit thrilling, and there is nothing creepy, horrific, or scary about it, not once, not ever. Besides the lack of anything interesting, the entire premise is rather ridiculous. First, the film claims to be based on a true story, but to be called "based on a true story" means admitting Sasquatch is real when frankly, it's really just lore. On top this, the Sasquatch not only has a sense of revenge, but it has a sense of keeping its existence secret, too. We almost feel bad for an actor like Lance Henricksen for being in this, especially considering he was once in James Cameron films such as "Aliens" and "The Terminator," but like the old saying goes, sometimes you gotta take work where you can get it. Well, after seeing this woefully rotten movie, we don't even know if Henricksen should have subscribed to this mindset as he probably could have gotten a more fulfilling experience giving pedicures to people with in-grown toenails, scalping tickets outside of a One Direction concert covered in brace-faced preteens and their snotty mothers, or shoveling dung outside of a horse racing tournament. We wish we could say more, but "Sasquatch" is hardly worth the time it would take to write anything else. Some movies just don't need to be made, and this is absolutely, positively one of them.

My Rating: 1.5/10
BigJ's Rating: 1.5/10
IMDB's Rating: 3.3/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: ---%
Do we recommend this movie: AVOID LIKE THE PLAGUE!!!
~~~~~~~~~~
One year ago, we were watching: "Boyhood"

Weekend Box Office Results: September 25th, 2015 - September 27th, 2015

The Monsters of "Hotel Transylvania 2" scare away the competition at the box office, break September records

*all numerical information provided by boxofficemojo.com

It's the final weekend of September and "Hotel Transylvania 2" opened to record breaking numbers by pulling in $47,500,000, making it the highest September opening ever. Debuting at #2 is the Nancy Meyers-directed comedy "The Intern," starring Anne Hathaway and Robert De Niro, which pulled in a respectable $18,225,000. Winning the tight battle for third place this weekend is the post-apocalyptic teen action adventure "The Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials," which added another $14,000,000 to its $51.6 million dollar total. Settling for #4 as its roll-out was expanded to a nationwide release from a limited IMAX exclusive was "Everest," which added $13,091,130 to its two-week $23 million dollar total. Closing out the top five is the true crime drama "Black Mass," which added $11,510,000 to it's $42.6 million domestic total.

		This Week	Domestic Gross
1	Hotel Transylvania 2	$47,500,000	$47,500,000
2	The Intern	$18,225,000	$18,225,000
3	Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials	$14,000,000	$51,685,572
4	Everest	$13,091,130	$23,130,935
5	Black Mass	$11,510,000	$42,608,179
6	The Visit	$6,749,925	$52,260,505
7	The Perfect Guy	$4,750,000	$48,871,135
8	War Room	$4,275,000	$55,999,681
9	The Green Inferno	$3,500,000	$3,500,000
10	Sicario	$1,770,000	$2,350,594

**See you at the movies!!**

Movie Review: "Hotel Transylvania" (2012)

Image Source

Movie: "Hotel Transylvania"
Director: Genndy Tartakovsky
Year: 2012
Rating: PG
Running Time: 1 hour, 31 minutes

Dracula (Adam Sandler) builds a secluded, secret hotel as a place of sanctuary for his daughter and the other monsters of the world to keep them safe from humans. Over the years, Dracula's daughter Mavis (Selena Gomez) has grown increasingly restless and curious about humans, but her father has managed so far to keep her afraid. As all the monsters prepare for Mavis's 118th birthday, a human named Johnny (Andy Samburg), on a backpacking trip, wanders into the hotel and immediately clicks with Mavis, but his presence has created chaos in Dracula's life and his attempt to keep his daughter away from humans.

"Hotel Transylvania," the movie where Adam Sandler and his friends take a break from making terrible live action films together and to make a pretty decent animated one. This movie takes the standard monster mythology and popular culture and flips it on its head. In this story, Dracula, played by Adam Sandler, and all the other monsters of the world live in fear of humans, who judge them and assume they are bad simply because they are monsters. Shortly after Dracula's daughter Mavis, played why? by Selena Gomez, was born, Dracula's wife was killed in a fire when an angry mob burned down their home. Ever since then, he has lived in hiding and has taken it upon himself to build the Hotel Transylvania, a hidden, lavish palace where all monsters, especially his daughter, would be safe from the stares and stabs of the human touch. Living in isolation for the past century, they aren't aware of the changes that have happened in big wide world and still believe all humans would kill them on sight. As Mavis gets older, she becomes increasingly more restless, wanting to leave the safety of her home and castle to explore the world. This obviously reflects the fears real parents have as their kids get older and ready to move out on their own, just taken to the extreme with a monster twist. In fact, most of this movie hinges on stereotypes about marriage and parenthood with a monster twist as Drac isn't the only one in this tale. Wayne the Werewolf, played by Steve Buscemi, has too many unruly kids and his life seems absolutely miserable. Frank the Monster, played by Kevin James, has the nagging wife. Dracula is the overprotective single father, and so on. Of course, this being a Sandler film plus a kid's movie, there are quiet a few fart jokes and other toilet humor along with a lot of slapstick. Hey, you gotta please the youngins somehow, right?! As most animated films go, at its crux, it's about a young woman who has spent most her life isolated and the first person her own age she meets, in this case Johnny, played by Andy Samburg, is clearly her true love as they fall for each other at first sight, that is if her father can get over the fact he's a human. Talk about cliche.

With that being said, there are some laughs to be had and "Hotel Transylvania" does have a bit of heart to it, but it's doesn't have nearly the amount of heart and sentiment or a strong message you'd see in a Disney Pixar movie. It doesn't offer a whole lot of newness in terms of plot aside from the aforementioned monster/human switch, and it's a toss-up if parents will enjoy watching this movie with their kids. It's a bit too juvenile for most adults, and when coupled with an all-inclusive fart script, it's not so awful that parents will hate themselves for taking their kids to see this movie, but it probably won't stick out as an uproarious kids-centric comedy or a tenderhearted animated film.

My Rating: 6.5/10
BigJ's Rating: 6.5/10
IMDB's Rating: 7.1/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 44%
Do we recommend this movie: Sure, why not?
~~~~~~~~~~
One year ago, we were watching: "Waking Ned Devine"

Movie Review #314: "Grandma" (2015)

Movie: "Grandma"
Ticket Price: $9.75
Director: Paul Weitz
Rating: R
Running Time: 1 hour, 29 minutes

Image Source

Desperate for help and having a strained relationship with her mother Judy (Marcia Gay Harden), Sage (Julia Garner) shows up at her grandma Elle's (Lily Tomlin) house begging for $600+ dollars for an abortion. Broke and without a credit card, Elle and Sage scurry about town trying to find the money from anyone and everyone they know.

When you think about your grandma, is she someone you could see yourself turning to for help with tracking down money for an abortion? Most people, we're willing to wager, would say a resounding no to this question. Lily Tomlin in "Grandma" is that type of grandparent, and hilariously and raucously so. Her performance as Elle, a lesbian who finds herself stuck trying to find $600 for her granddaughter Sage, played by Julia Garner, while in the middle of a break-up with her short-term girlfriend Olivia, played by Judy Greer, is nothing short of spectacular. Tomlin is jarring, fiery, feisty, and doesn't put up with anyone's bullshit. Her views can be pretty out there and she's not afraid to tell it like it is in any and all circumstances. Elle is a writer and poet, but is down on her luck and stuck in a rut at the moment, financially and when it comes to her writing. Her long-term partner Violet has recently passed away from an undisclosed terminal illness. Elle has just cut up all her credit cards after paying off her debt, which included tens of thousands of dollars in medical bills from Violet's illness, so it's shocking when her granddaughter, a innocent enough teenager, shows up on her doorstep begging for money for such a procedure. Neither Elle nor Sage have a good relationship with Judy, Elle's daughter and Sage's mother, played by the wonderful Marica Gay Harden, who is a tightly wound workaholic and always expresses her displeasure with anything whenever she is given the chance. Elle and Sage go on a hunt about town to track down any money they can before Sage's appointment that night at a women's clinic. Along the way, many skeletons from Elle's closet are uncovered as the two of them meet, friends, former lovers, and people Sage never even knew existed from Elle's long, seasoned life.

Abortion is a touchy subject matter any way you look at it. Movies often deal with it in a very frank, earnest manner, and "Grandma" is no different. It puts the issue front and center, and though the film is a comedy, it never treats it as a joke. The movie as a whole discusses a lot of hot-button political issues pertinent to our society today, but it never feels preachy about them. These situations are simply presented as the events that exist within the story and are delivered in an extraordinary manner from everyone cast in the film. Lily Tomlin delivers her lines with an abrasive but endearing attitude. She never minces her words and always expresses herself no matter who it will offend. She gives a versatile performance here and one we think should be recognized in the coming months at the various awards ceremonies. Julia Garner has a sweet look about her, so when Sage finds herself in such a dramatic situation with nowhere but her grandma to turn, it is both scary and nerve-wracking, and she portrays Sage very well. Sam Elliot boasts a brief but gut-wrenchingly powerful performance as Karl, someone from Elle's past that she hasn't seen in 30 years. Their exchanges together range from tense to shocking as they definitely have some unresolved issues with one another. Many other performances are brief, but fit and excel in powering an emotional point home.

"Grandma" teeters the fine line between heartbreaking and hilarious. It is packed with incredible, heartfelt performances at every turn from three generations of women who are just as screwed up if not more so than the last. It is insightful, tender, and though short, it packs a hefty emotional punch in such a short run time. We definitely recommend this movie!

My Rating: 8/10
BigJ's Rating: 8/10
IMDB's Rating: 7.1/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 93%
Do we recommend this movie: Yes!

Movie Review #313: "The Perfect Guy" (2015)

Movie: "The Perfect Guy"
Ticket Price: $9.75
Director: David M. Rosenthal
Rating: PG-13
Running Time: 1 hour, 40 minutes

Image Source

Leah (Sanaa Lathan) has just broken up with her long-time boyfriend Dave (Morris Chestnut) over his unwillingness to commit to marriage and kids. One night while waiting for her friend at a restaurant bar, she is rescued from the unwanted advances of an obnoxious drunk trying to pick her up by Carter (Michael Ealy), a man she met a while back at a coffee shop. Carter pretends to be her boyfriend to chase off the obnoxious guy. Needless to say, she and Carter hit it off as he is very charming and seems like the perfect guy. Her friends like him, her parents like him, and she thinks he might be the one, until one evening at a gas station when Carter severely beats a man who he saw talking to Leah, even though he was just innocently admiring Carter's Dodge Charger. Leah immediately breaks it off, but Carter will not be dissuaded so easily as he begins to stalk and harass her even after Leah rekindles her relationship with Dave. 

"The Perfect Guy" is the second "Fatal Attraction"-style movie to come out this year, the first being the wretched, atrocious film "The Boy Next Door." Despite many similarities to the aforementioned abomination, this film does manage to be at least somewhat effective when it comes to thrills and relationship chills. A lot of that effectiveness has to do with how creepy Michael Ealy is as the stalker ex-boyfriend Carter. He is the primary reason this film is watchable since some characters seem either pointless or useless, and we're looking at you, Morris Chestnut, you beautiful son of a bitch, you might have the looks, but you were pointless in this film. Ealy has this creepiness factor to his look, and we mean that in the best way possible. Something about his eyes framed in many scenes are particularly unsettling as he does everything he can to keep Leah, played by Sanaa Lathan, in his life, even if it means breaking and entering, stalking, or even murder. From the moment he steps innocently enough onto the screen, we know he's going to set Leah's life into a tailspin, potentially taking those she loves the most down with her. Sanaa Lathan does a pretty good job as Leah, though with most films like this, they "let" the female character make the necessary stupid mistakes to make harassing her as easy as possible. This is not a flaw on the part of Lathan, just the writing staff, and Lathan performs decently with what she has put in front of her in terms of a script. Unfortunately, a couple of good performances does not a good movie make, and there are many contrived, expected, and cheesy moments from the get-go. One in particular has to do with Carter instantly appearing behind someone after being in a completely different place, making it seem as if he has the ability to teleport like he's Houdini or something, all so the film can deliver a nice boo-type of jump scare to the obviously suspecting audience. Another things common with these harassment films is that the police are always portrayed as completely inept at their jobs, impotent in their abilities to help the public at large, forcing the protagonist(s) to take the law into their own hands in a grandiose finale. This movie is no different and we see the ending coming from a mile away, apart from one extra plot point in between its beginning and end.

Even though there are many cliche instances here, and it's a story we've seen numerous times before, sometimes better and definitely sometimes worse, there are enough moments in "The Perfect Guy" which offer a good level of creepiness and some strong, tension-filled scenes and interactions between characters. Michael Ealy is at the top of his game right now and it's nice to see him step outside of the comedy genre and into a meatier role, we just wish this movie could have done something a little different to distinguish itself among the rest of the "No Good Deed" and "Fatal Attraction"s of the world.

My Rating: 5.5/10
BigJ's Rating: 5.5/10
IMDB's Rating: 5.1/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 19%
Do we recommend this movie: Meh.

Movie Review: "It's Complicated" (2009)

Image Source

Movie: "It's Complicated"
Director: Nancy Meyers
Year: 2009
Rating: R
Running Time: 2 hours

Divorcee Jane Adler's (Meryl Streep) life becomes very complicated when she begins an affair with her married ex-husband Jake (Alec Baldwin), who left her for a younger woman 10 years earlier. To make things even more complicated, just after beginning her affair, she is asked on a date by her architect Adam (Steve Martin) who she has taken a liking to. Not wanting to ruffle any feathers with anyone, she hides her affair from everyone else, even her 3 grown kids Luke (Hunter Parrish), Gabby (Zoe Kazan), and Lauren (Caitlin FitzGerald).

Can Meryl Streep really ever do wrong?

"It's Complicated" is a romantic comedy, just not the one you'd expect. Meryl Streep plays Jane, a chef who has finally gotten her life back on track after her ex-husband Jake, played by Alec Baldwin, cheated on her 10 years ago. Jane and Jake have a decent enough relationship now, and he has since remarried a woman much younger than him named Agness Adler, played by Lake Bell. Jane is in the process of remodeling her home with the help of a man named Adam, played by Steve Martin, a very patient, kind man who is going through a much fresher divorce himself. Jane and Adam take a liking to one another, though she often forgets they have meetings scheduled, which would give anyone a complex. Jane and Jake's son Luke, played by Hunter Parrish, is about to graduate from college in New York, which means a reconvening of the entire family in the Big Apple, and though she was supposed to come, Agnes wound up staying home because she was sick. Jane and Jake accidentally meet at the hotel's restaurant one night, and drinks led to dinner, which led to more drinks and dancing, which led to...well, you catch our drift. The spark gets reignited in their relationship, and though their affair starts as a one-time thing, as it often does, Jake wants to continue it when they return home, even though Jane finds herself getting closer and closer to Adam. What's a gal to do?

Meryl Streep is flawless, and though her character is less than saintly, she portrays both the "other woman" well in terms of guilt, happiness, and secrecy. On the flip side, we believe her as a woman in her 50's who is moving on from her divorce, though it took a long time to get to the good place she's in at the start of the film. Alec Baldwin as Jake is also convincing. He looks just smarmy enough to be someone who might get back together with his ex behind his current wife's back, but we as the audience can also sometimes feel the hurt when Jane rebuffs his advances. In his new relationship with Agness, a much younger woman, he has to try and balance getting older and wanting to help his wife have another baby, all while being step-father to her unruly devil child Pedro, the result of Agness cheating on Jake. Hey, the name of the movie doesn't lie, it is complicated! Jake is not happy in his current situation and wonders if he should have divorced Jane in the first place. Steve Martin is the perfect choice for Adam. He is sweet, humble, just angry enough, funny, sentimental, and an all-around good guy, the perfect choice for Jane, if only she could get her head out of her ass long enough to see it. The aforementioned Kazan, Parrish, and FitzGerald, Jane and Jake's 3 kids, do fine in their parts, albeit a little over the top with the drama, but most of the comic relief comes from John Krasinski, who plays Harley and inadvertently finds out about Jane and Jake's tryst and has to maintain his silence in many hilarious ways, including toking up with them in a bathroom.

Though the acting is all around quite good, the movie isn't perfect. It is so ridiculously predictable, it didn't even really need to get made. Each and every plot point has been seen before and it really offers nothing new, other than a ludicrous R-rating for recreational marijuana use, which are some of the funniest parts of the film. The jokes are the same as they are any romantic comedy with aging protagonists; jokes about growing older, about having sexual troubles, about dying and moving on in life are all typical fodder for this type of film, but its predictability doesn't really hurt the movie since it still manages to be a good time. The cast is charming, and with Streep at the helm as the family's matriarch, what's not to love? "It's Complicated" is a film at least I enjoy watching every now and then, even if it is expected.

My Rating: 7.5/10
BigJ's Rating: 7/10
IMDB's Rating: 6.6/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 57%
Do we recommend this movie: Sure, why not?
~~~~~~~~~~
One year ago, we were watching: "Piranha"

Oscar Movie Review: "Julia" (1977)

Image Source

Movie: "Julia"
Year Nominated: 1978
Director: Fred Zinnemann
Rating: PG
Running Time: 1 hour, 57 minutes
Did It Win?: No.

Successful playwright Lillian Hellman (Jane Fonda) reminisces about her dearest friend Julia (Vanessa Redgrave), who is a human rights advocate in pre-World War II Austria and Germany. Lillian recounts the events that lead Julia to ask her to smuggle $50,000 into Nazi controlled Berlin to be used to free some wrongfully held political prisoners and other innocent people. 

When this film came out in 1977, it was nominated for a ridiculous amount of Academy Awards, 11 in total, and took home 3 when all was said and done. But to tell you the truth, we would have never even heard of this movie if we weren't for our continual Oscar quest. It's is true that it came out before either of us were born, but a lot of flicks came out before we were born that we love. This is just one of those movies that seemed politically important at the time it was made, but simply didn't have the staying power of other more crucial movies of its era. This movie also shows how just anything about WWII and the Nazi persecution of the Jewish people was seemingly made to be Oscar-baity, even back in the 70's, so not that much has changed as far as the Academy is concerned.

Though it does take a different approach and tell a different story about the historical events of WWII, for us, "Julia" was rather poorly paced. It moves really slow at some points and only has a couple moments that are really intense. When Lillian, played by Jane Fonda, is in Nazi occupied territories like Austria visiting Julia, played by Vanessa Redgrave, in the hospital, or when Lillian is smuggling money sneakily into Berlin for Julia, these are the times when things get really interesting and exciting as viewers. The rest of the film involves Lillian wondering about Julia, thinking about how is she doing, or what is she doing, and wondering when, if ever, she will see her again. These periods of lulling slowness in between intense moments are rather uninteresting and stuffy, almost bringing the movie to a grinding halt. The entire film is shown through flashbacks, and then flashbacks of flashbacks, as it jumps all over a vague timeline throughout its two hour run time. There are a lot of scenes that are meant to build up Lillian and Julia's characters both individually and together, to show how their friendship grew over the decades and reveal how the first got close but then faded as time rolled on, but mostly we found ourselves simply not caring very much about this build up. The whole story overall is very disjointed. As far as the acting goes, when you match up the amount of screen time Redgrave and Fonda have minute for minute, Redgrave's amount is much, much less, and somehow, she is able to give the more powerful performance of the two. Ultimately, we found ourselves unaffected by the personal tragedies being expressed in "Julia."

Though the score throughout the film and the location where the movie is shot and set are both beautiful, there aren't enough interesting moments to offset the amount of mundane, tedious flashbacks and lulls in alluring details. Redgrave's performance is good, but not good enough to be compelling enough to make us care about the story as a whole.

My Rating: 6/10
BigJ's Rating: 5/10
IMDB's Rating: 7.4/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 74%
Do we recommend this movie: Meh.
~~~~~~~~~~
One year ago, we were watching: "Lucy"

Movie Review #312: "Captive" (2015)

Movie: "Captive"
Ticket Price: $6.50
Director: Jerry Jameson
Rating: PG-13
Running Time: 1 hour, 37 minutes

Image Source

Facing rape and kidnapping charges, Brian Nichols (David Oyleowo), while being brought into court, escapes from custody when he overpowers his guard. He steals her gun and murders three people during his escape, including the judge who was overseeing his trial. While on the lamb, Brian murders a fourth person for his truck before taking a meth addict named Ashley Smith (Kate Mara) hostage in her brand new apartment.  


Based on real life events surrounding Brian Nichols and Ashley Smith and the subsequent book entitled "The Unlikely Angel" she wrote detailing her account of her experience, "Captive" is an okay movie and another in a long line of true crime dramas from 2015. It exists, it is here, but the entire ordeal didn't necessarily need a movie in the first place. In March of 2005, when everyone and their mother still had flip phones, Brian Nichols, played here by David Oyelowo, escaped from prison, murdering four people in the process, before taking a drug addict named Ashley Smith, played in the movie by Kate Mara, hostage. When we first saw the trailer for this movie, it seemed to be directly geared towards those who are religiously inclined, leading us to believe this was another "faith-based" film with a focus on the book "The Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren. Now that we've seen the movie, we would have to say that no, this is not really a faith-based film as the book only serves as a footnote in the grand scheme of the story. We aren't really sure if this was done on purpose to capitalize on the ever-growing genre of religious-centered films, which have become more popular in theaters as of recent years, but it seems as if the actual story itself wasn't necessarily entrenched in religion apart from the fact that "The Purpose Driven Life" was read by Smith to Nichols during their time together.

It doesn't appear as if there was a really in-depth story to be told here, and again, we're not sure if it needed to be re-told since it already happened in reality. Much of the film is the standard fugitive/hostage style movie and doesn't offer anything all that new or different in this vein. Regardless, David Oyelowo, even in a typical, mediocre movie, still performs the hell out of each and every part he plays, and this is no different. Unfortunately, we are not fans of how the filmmakers tried to turn Brian Nichols into an almost sympathetic character at times. What he did to deserve to go to jail in the first place was morally reprehensible, contemptible, and disgusting, and this is all before he even murdered anybody. The real Brian Nichols has shown little remorse for his actions and he has even been caught on tape saying if given the chance, he'd do it all again. There's a scene in the movie where, after trying to give Nichols a shred of redemption, he basically tells Ashley Smith something the effect of, "I killed those people because it felt good, and I would do it again." Does this sound like the kind of person a movie should try to sympathize or redeem in any way? We say HELL NO. This hostage crisis was obviously a point of great revelation in the life of Ashley Smith and it seems as though the filmmakers missed a couple of opportunities for some more powerful moments that could have engaged viewers even more than they may have already been. The reality of what happened was far more compelling than what wound up on screen, so we would have liked to see a bit more emotional connection. Coming so close to death and discovering that you really wanted to live after being a drug addicted screw up for so long would definitely drive almost anyone to change their life for the better. Kate Mara, coming off of a huge stinker of a film in "Fantastic Four" gets another chance to showcase her dramatic acting chops here, which she seems better at than anything else. She was fine in this movie and we believe her as a meth addict who just wants to stop using so she can get her daughter back and regain control of her life.

Though having some missed opportunities and not living up to the potential of what it could have been, we weren't bored by the movie in the slightest. There are a few moments where the director thought they'd try and get all artsy-fartsy with the camera work, but other than that, we didn't dislike this film. Another plus it has going for it is its pacing, which wasn't an issue at all as it breezed through its run time. In the end, though, "Captive" is a very average with a sort of afterschool special/Lifetime movie type of feel to it that is somewhat forgettable, though it does have a couple of solid performances by two up and coming actors who will soon even forget they were in this movie.

My Rating: 6/10
BigJ's Rating: 6/10
IMDB's Rating: 6.2/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 31%
Do we recommend this movie: Sure, why not?

Movie Review: "Enemy Mine" (1985)

Image Source

Movie: "Enemy Mine"
Director: Wolfgang Petersen
Year: 1985
Rating: PG-13
Running Time: 1 hour, 48 minutes

After peace is found on Earth, humans start expanding into space and colonizing new planets. While they expand deeper into the universe, humans find they aren't alone as they start to encroach on planets that are already claimed. This creates a war between earthlings and a reptilian alien race known as the Dracs. During a dog fight, a fighter pilot named Willis Davidge (Dennis Quaid) crash lands on an unpopulated planet, as does the Drac pilot named Jeriba Shigan (Louis Gossett Jr.) he was battling with. In order to survive, these two enemies from different cultures and speak different languages, must learn to survive together or die apart.

"Enemy Mine" is an 80's sci-fi drama that deals with extreme culture clash and is one of BigJ's sentimental favorite films. Here, two soldiers from warring worlds have to find common ground in order to survive. This, as we all know, is a story that gets told in many different ways often about people from two different countries or from two different races, only here, it's taken to the sci-fi realm of outer space. There are no bones about it, the special effects in this movie are pretty bad, and in fact are sometimes almost laughably bad. Anything involving a ship in this movie, be it flying through space or even through an explosion, is just so low budget and so cheesy that it doesn't even come close to looking convincing. 80's special effects often don't hold up well, and this film is a prime example where this statement is 100% true. That being said, the makeup work done on the character of Jerry the Drac is extremely good. It is done very well and looks very convincing. We completely buy Louis Gossett Jr. as part of an alien race called the Drac, rather than him being just a guy in makeup. He and Willis Davidge, played by Dennis Quaid, often argue and insult each other throughout the movie as they first don't understand each other, literally and figuratively. Davidge insults the great Drac teacher, whose name I can't pronounce and won't try to spell, and the Drac, who Davidge calls Jerry, returns insults at earth's great teacher Mickey Mouse. Eventually, the two have to learn to work together and begin to, slowly but surely, understand each other, even with their faults. We also learn a lot about the Dracs as a race. They are asexual beings and can reproduce without sex. Eventually, the film reaches a point where Willis might have to stand in defense of a Drac against a human and in defiance of his own military simply because it's the right thing to do, to protect this being he now calls his friend. Sometimes, a person from one culture can understand a person from another culture easier than a whole group of people might understand another whole group of people. Though this movie is a dated sci-fi drama with bad special effects, even by 80's standards, it has a good message and delivers it well. For me, not growing up with this movie, it seems weird and out of place in the grand scheme of films. There are other, better, and less freaky movies that give the same sentiment and message which I'd rather watch than this, though the characters do keep the audience engaged and guessing throughout the film's run time. Overall, a meh-worthy sci-fi 80's movie for me, and one BigJ really enjoys pulling out to view every now and then.

My Rating: 5.5/10
BigJ's Rating: 7/10
IMDB's Rating: 6.9/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 59%
Do we recommend this movie: Sure, why not?
~~~~~~~~~~
One year ago, we were watching: "Clockers"

Movie Review: "School of Rock" (2003)

Image Source

Movie: "School of Rock"
Director: Richard Linklater
Year: 2003
Rating: PG-13
Running Time: 1 hour, 48 minutes

Dewey Finn (Jack Black) was just kicked out of his band and is past due on his rent. Desperate to make some money, Dewey, pretending to be his roommate Ned, takes a substitute teaching job at a high-class prep school, though he knows nothing about teaching. When he first arrives, he is nothing more than a glorified babysitter, but when he learns many of his students are musically inclined, he turns the kids into his new rock band and teaches them about rock and roll so he can use them to compete in the Battle of the Bands. 

The best way to describe "School of Rock" is cute and joyful. Perpetual man-child Jack Black plays Dewey Finn, a man who has shirked all of the responsibilities that come with being an adult in order to pursue his dream of being a rock star. He gets kicked out of his band, not because he can't play or sing, but because his over-the-top, obnoxious on stage behavior is far too distracting for the rest of the band. To top it off, his roommate Ned, played by the film's writer Michael White, is being pressured by his girlfriend, played by Sarah Silverman, to kick him out of their apartment because he hasn't paid his share of the rent. Desperate for money, he poses as his roommate, who is a substitute teacher, and takes a job at a prep school. This, of course, sets the stage for the underachieving but worldly slacker poised to teach a group of wealthy pre-teens who are being prepped for their eventual entry into elite colleges. Though Dewey has no real desire or even ability to teach these kids anything, especially since they are already smarter than he is when it comes to general education subjects, despite his best efforts, he does so anyway. One thing Dewey does know is rock and roll. When he learns that many of the kids in "his" class can play instruments and are actually quite good at their instrument of their choice, he jumps in head first into to teaching them about rock music, starting with how to play it, how to look the part, and of important figures from the history of the genre. He also teaches them how to imbibe the spirit of the rebellious rocker at the heart of each of his students. He turns his students into a band, but has some selfish motives and reasons for doing this. Dewey wants to use the kids to compete at a battle of the bands competition so he can not only win the prize money, but show up his old band as well. Of course, lessons are learned on both sides of the equation in an often heartwarming and touching manner. Though he takes the students away from their studies, Dewey is able to teach them some valuable life lessons about confidence and believing in yourself. In many ways, "School of Rock" is very formulaic, but regardless, it is wholly entertaining, really fun to watch, and has some great laugh out loud moments as he comes dangerously close to blowing his cover on more than one occasion.

Jack Black does what Jack Black does best, and that is playing a theatrical version of himself, the slacker rocker who shoves off authority and could care less about responsibilities so long as he's following his heart and what he loves to do. How much you like Black as an actor will impact how much you like the movie as a whole, and luckily, we really like Jack Black. It also helps a lot that Black, half of the rock duo Tenacious D, can really sing AND play his own instruments, too, giving him the look, the persona, and the attitude of a phony teacher who wants to educate in the lessons of rock n' roll. Joan Cusack is also excellent as Ms. Mullins, the uptight principle of the school who senses there's something not quite right with Dewey and wants to get to the bottom of it. She also has a rock side to her that comes out, coaxed by Dewey to benefit himself, of course. Being a rock music movie, there is, as anticipated, a big, kick ass concert scene at the end of the film where the band performs their original songs. This is a pretty great scene and boasts a catchy song, too. It's also awesome knowing the kids in Dewey's class are actually playing their own instruments and singing their own songs throughout the film.

The inspiration, the humor, the "unleash your inner rebellious rocker" attitude and the compelling story this movie has really makes it a joy to watch, even a decade plus later. Richard Linklater of recent "Boyhood" fame does an excellent job directing this movie and truly encapsulates the fun and the spirit of following your dreams, even when "the man" gets you down. This movie is not just for kids, adults with a heart will love it, too!

My Rating: 8/10
BigJ's Rating: 7/10
IMDB's Rating: 7.1/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 92%
Do we recommend this movie: Yes!
~~~~~~~~~~
One year ago, we were watching: "20 Feet from Stardom"

Movie Review: "The Sword in the Stone" (1963)

Image Source

Movie: "The Sword in the Stone"
Director: Woldgang Reutherman
Year: 1963
Rating: PG
Running Time: 1 hour, 19 minutes

A wizard named Merlin (Karl Swenson) helps educate a young orphan named Arthur (Rickie Sorensen) and guides him to realize his true destiny.  

Disney tells their version of the T.H. White novel "The Sword in the Stone" in this 1963 animated feature, which has always been one of BigJ's favorites, but not really one of mine. They tell the tale King Arthur, voiced by Rickie Sorensen, as a young orphan boy who has been given the nickname Wart by his guardian Sir Ector, voiced by Sebastian Cabet. Wart seems to have small hopes in life and his biggest aspiration is to be the squire of his guardian's son Kale, voiced by Norman Alden. But Wart's life changes when he meets a wizard named Merlin, voiced by Karl Swenson, and his smug and snarky yet intelligent talking owl Archimedes, voiced by Junius Matthews. Merlin knows Wart is destined for big things as he can see into the future, but he's a little absent-minded to say the least, so he's not exactly sure what that destiny is specifically. Merlin teaches Wart the importance of a good education, which is always a great message to push towards children, as well as the importance of brains over brawn, even in the dark ages, which was a time where so much was decided by hand-to-hand combat. Merlin accomplishes this teaching by letting Wart experience life as many different animals, including a fish, a squirrel, and a bird. These scenes are all great fun and lead to some exciting, sometimes funny yet sometimes dangerous situations. The main climatic scene in the teaching of these lessons is a showdown between Merlin and a witch named Mad Madam Mim, voiced by Martha Wintworth, who have a wizards duel where they change into a series of animals to defeat one another. This is one of BigJ's favorite scenes. This take on the classic story is on kids will love even today, and one adults who grew up with it will remember fondly.

There is, of course, some great music in the film, and though they are fun, the songs aren't quite as memorable as those from other Disney films of the same era. The era we refer to runs from about 1951 with "Alice in Wonderland" all the way to 1973 with "Robin Hood." All the films that run through this time frame have a similar animation style and feel, and while watching "The Sword in the Stone," it dawned on me that this style was getting pretty tiresome. Though not the greatest Disney animated feature, it is certainly a good, entertaining picture and one at least BigJ will always have fond memories of.

My Rating: 6.5/10
BigJ's Rating: 7.5/10
IMDB's Rating: 7.2/10
Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 71%
Do we recommend this movie: Sure, why not?
~~~~~~~~~~
One year ago, we were watching: "About Last Night"

Weekend Box Office Results: September 18th, 2015 - September 20th, 2015

Dystopic teen film "Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials" beats true crime biopic "Black Mass" this weekend at the box office

*all numerical information provided by boxofficemojo.com

It would appear that teenagers and dystopic futures are still a winning combination at the movies as "Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials" topped the box office charts this weekend, pulling in an estimated $30,300,000 this weekend, which is slightly less than the previous installment of the franchise. Coming in at #2 this weekend was is the true crime biopic "Black Mass" about the notorious Irish mob kingpin "Whitey" Bulger, which earned $23,360,000. This film boasts the return of Johnny Depp to Hollywood greatness, even though he never really went anywhere. M. Night Shyamalan's latest film, the found footage horror flick "The Visit" pulled in another $11,348,540 this weekend, switching places with "The Perfect Guy," which favored better last week and came in at #4 this weekend, making $9,655,000. Finally, the IMAX released version of "Everest" rounds out the top 5, making $7,557,515 ahead of its wider release, non-IMAX roll out.

		This Week	Domestic Gross
1	Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials	$30,300,000	$30,300,000
2	Black Mass	$23,360,000	$23,360,000
3	The Visit	$11,348,540	$42,346,860
4	The Perfect Guy	$9,655,000	$41,365,472
5	Everest	$7,557,515	$7,557,515
6	War Room	$6,320,000	$49,158,662
7	A Walk in the Woods	$2,732,730	$24,837,175
8	Mission Impossible: Rogue  Nation	$2,250,000	$191,732,210
9	Straight Outta Compton	$1,967,070	$158,918,330
10	Grandma	$1,900,000	$3,790,539

**See you at the movies!!**